生活經(jīng)典幽默笑話三則

　　在日常繁忙的生活中，也不要忘了放松自己的心情。下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編為大家?guī)?lái)生活經(jīng)典幽默笑話三則，希望大家喜歡!

　　生活經(jīng)典幽默笑話：哲學(xué)考試

　　A philosophy professor warned the classhe was going to give them a test.

　　一位哲學(xué)教授通知學(xué)生他要舉行一場(chǎng)考試。

　　When the day came he entered the classroom,wordlessly placed his chair on the table and,turning to the blackboard, wrote,

　　考試那天，他走進(jìn)教室，一言不發(fā)地把自己的椅子放到講臺(tái)上，然后轉(zhuǎn)身在黑板上寫道，

　　"Prove to me this chair does not exist."

　　“請(qǐng)向我證明這張椅子不存在。”

　　Most of the nervous studentbegan intently scribbling out long dissertations.

　　大多數(shù)學(xué)生很緊張，都開(kāi)始專心地寫他們的論文。

　　But one member of the class wrote down just two words,and then handed his paper to the teacher.

　　只有一個(gè)學(xué)生只寫了兩個(gè)單詞就交卷了。

　　The professor had to smile when he read the student's answer:"What chair?"

　　當(dāng)教授看到這個(gè)學(xué)生的答案時(shí)，不由微笑了，只見(jiàn)他寫的是：“什么椅子啊?”

　　生活經(jīng)典幽默笑話：有同情心的訪客

　　A big burly man visited the pastor's homeand asked to see the minister's wife,a woman well known for her charitable impulses.

　　一個(gè)高大魁梧的男人到牧師家拜訪，他要求會(huì)見(jiàn)牧師的妻子，這是一個(gè)以有著慈悲心腸而聞名的婦女。

　　"Madam," he said in a broken voice,"I wish to draw your attentionto the terrible plight of a poor family in this district.

　　男人用令人心碎的聲音說(shuō)，“夫人，我希望能引起您的注意的是，這個(gè)地區(qū)有一戶人家現(xiàn)在生活特別困頓，

　　The father is dead, the mother is too ill to work,and the nine children are starving.

　　父親死了，母親也因重病無(wú)法工作，九個(gè)孩子都在挨餓。

　　They are about to be turned into the cold,empty streets unless someone pays their rent,which amounts to 0."

　　他們即將被趕到空蕩蕩的大街上，如果沒(méi)有人為他們付400美元的房租的話。”

　　"How terrible!"

　　“這么糟糕!”

　　exclaimed the preacher's wife."May I ask who you are?"

　　牧師的妻子驚叫，“我能問(wèn)問(wèn)您是誰(shuí)嗎?”

　　The sympathetic visitor applied his handkerchief to his eyes."I'm the landlord." he sobbed.

　　這個(gè)富于同情心的訪客用手絹拭著眼睛，啜泣著說(shuō)：“我就是他們的房東。”

　　生活經(jīng)典幽默笑話：重量事宜

　　Somewhat sceptical of his son's newfound determination to become Charles Atlas, the father nevertheless followed the teenager over to the weight-lifting department, admiring a set of weights.

　　兒子最近決心要成為Charles Atlas，對(duì)于這個(gè)決定，父親多少有點(diǎn)懷疑，不過(guò)他還是陪著兒子去了舉重器材商店，在那里他們看上了一套舉重器材。

　　"Please, Dad," pleaded the boy, "I promise I'll use 'em every day.""I don't know, Michael.

　　“哦，爸爸，給我買一套吧，”兒子企求道，“我答應(yīng)我一定每天都會(huì)用它們來(lái)練習(xí)的。”

　　It's really a commitment on your part," the father pointed out."Please, Dad?" the boy continued.

　　“我也不知道，Michael。這對(duì)你來(lái)說(shuō)的確是一項(xiàng)承諾，”父親對(duì)兒子指出這一點(diǎn)。

　　"They're not cheap either," the father came back.

　　“好不好嘛，爸爸?”男孩繼續(xù)央告。“而且這套器材可不便宜。”父親又說(shuō)。

　　"I'll use 'em Dad, I promise. You'll see.

　　“我真的會(huì)天天練的，爸爸，我答應(yīng)你。你會(huì)看到的。”

　　"Finally won over, the father paid for the equipment and headed for the door.From the corner of the store he heard his son yelp, "What! You mean I have to carry them to the car?"

　　最后，父親被說(shuō)服了，他買了這套設(shè)備，然后向門外走去。就在這個(gè)時(shí)候，他聽(tīng)到兒子在商店角落里尖叫著嚷道，“什么!你的意思是我得一個(gè)人把這些東西扛到車上去?”