英語(yǔ)笑話大全
英語(yǔ)笑話大全
笑話是現(xiàn)代社會(huì)發(fā)展最快的一種口頭文學(xué)體裁,它體現(xiàn)了某一民族行為中最深刻的和潛意識(shí)中的觀點(diǎn)。學(xué)習(xí)啦小編整理了爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話，歡迎閱讀!
爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話篇一
doctor: ′i can do nothing for your complaint. it is hereditary.′
醫(yī)生：對(duì)你的抱怨我無(wú)能為力。那是遺傳病。
patient: ′then send the bill to my father, please.′
病人：那請(qǐng)你把賬單給我父親吧。
爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話篇二
the soldiers had been marching and fighting, they were dirty, hot and tired. one day, the general announced: "my men, i have some good news and some bad news for you. which one would you like first?"
士兵們連續(xù)的行軍，作戰(zhàn)，他們又累又熱又臟。一天，將軍宣布：“士兵們，我有一些好消息和壞消息要告訴你們。你們?cè)敢庀嚷?tīng)哪個(gè)呢?”
"the good news!" they all shouted.
“好消息!”他們?nèi)碌馈?/p>
"ok," said the general. "the good news is that you will each be receiving a complete change of clothing."
“好吧，”將軍說(shuō)，“好消息就是你們每個(gè)人都可以徹底的換一身衣服。”
"hurrah!" chorused the soldiers.
“烏拉!”士兵們高興地大叫起來(lái)。
"and now for the bad news. jack, you will change with john. john, you will change with tom. tom, you will change with robert. robert ...
“現(xiàn)在呢，該是壞消息了。杰克，你將和約翰換衣服，約翰，你和湯姆換，湯姆，你和羅伯特?fù)Q，羅伯特……
爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話篇三
in a sales company, the boss said to one of his employees,
銷售公司的老板對(duì)一位員工訓(xùn)話：
"the main thing to remember is repetition, repetition, repetition! that's the key! if you have a product to sell, keep harping on it in every way possible. repeat it; cram it down people's throats. even make yourself sickening and repulsive if you have to, but don't everforget to repeat, repeat, repeat. it's the only way to get results and sell our products!"
“重要的是要記得重復(fù)、重復(fù)、重復(fù)!‘不斷重復(fù)’是重要關(guān)鍵!推銷產(chǎn)品時(shí)，要用盡各種方法對(duì)客戶不斷反復(fù)地游說(shuō)，對(duì)他們進(jìn)行疲勞轟炸。情況需
要的話，即使讓對(duì)方對(duì)你厭惡、反感也在所不惜。就是不要忘記‘重復(fù)再重復(fù)!’這是得到業(yè)績(jī)、銷售產(chǎn)品的不二法門!”
so, the employee said, "yes, sir!"
員工回答：“老板，了解了!”
then the boss said, "now, what was it you came to see me about?"
老板又說(shuō)：“好，現(xiàn)在說(shuō)說(shuō)看你們來(lái)找我有什么事?”
and the employee replied, "well, sir, it's about a raise, a raise, a raise!"
員工回答：“老板，我要加薪!加薪!加薪!”
看了“爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話”的人還看了：