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學(xué)習(xí)啦 > 學(xué)習(xí)英語 > 英語閱讀 > 英語笑話 > 關(guān)于健康的英語笑話

關(guān)于健康的英語笑話

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關(guān)于健康的英語笑話

  下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編整理的關(guān)于健康的英語笑話,以供大家學(xué)習(xí)參考。

  關(guān)于健康的英語笑話:

  A man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?" and God says: "A penny", then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?" and God says: "a second", then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?" and God says "In a second"

  一男子進(jìn)入教堂和上帝對話.他問:"主啊, 一百萬美元對你意味著多少?"上帝回答:"一便士."男子又問:"那一百萬年呢?"上帝說:"一秒鐘."最后男子請求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士嗎?"上帝回答:"過一秒鐘."

  關(guān)于健康的英語笑話: allybaby

  Once two hunters went hunting in the forest. One of them suddenly fell down by accident. He showed the whites of his eyes and seemed to have ceased breathing. The other hunter soon took out his mobile phone to call the emergency center for help. The operator said calmly:"First, you should make sure that he is already dead." Then the operator heard a gunshot from the other end of the phone and next he heard the hunter asking:"What should I do next?"

  兩個獵人進(jìn)森林里打獵,其中一個獵人不慎跌倒,兩眼翻白,似已停止呼吸。另一個獵人趕緊拿出手機(jī)撥通緊急求助電話。接線員沉著地說:“第一步,要先確定你的朋友已經(jīng)死亡。”于是,接線員在電話里聽到一聲槍響,然后聽到那獵人接著問:“第二步怎辦?”

  關(guān)于健康的英語笑話:Two roaches having a discussion

  Two roaches were munching on garbage in an alley when one engages a discussion about a new restaurant."I was in that new restaurant across the street," said one. "It's so clean! The kitchen is spotless, and the floors are gleaming white. There is no dirt anywhere--it's so sanitary that the whole place shines."

  "Please," said the other roach frowning. "Not while I'm eating!"

  3 Dick was seven years old, and his sister, Catherine, was five. One day their mother took them to their aunt's house to play while she went to the big city to buy some new clothes.

  The children played for an hour, and then at half past four their aunt took Dick into the kitchen. She gave him a nice cake and a knife and said to him, "Now here's a knife, Dick. Cut this cake in half and give one of the pieces to your sister, but remember to do it like a gentleman."

  "Like a gentleman?" Dick asked. "How do gentlemen do it?"

  "They always give the bigger piece to the other person." answered his aunt at once.

  "Oh" said Dick. He thought about this for a few seconds. Then he took the cake to his sister and said to her,"Cut this cake in half, Catherine.".

  迪克年齡七歲,他的妹妹凱瑟琳五歲。一天,媽媽把他們帶到姨媽家去玩,自己就到大城市去買些新的衣服。孩子們玩了個把小時(shí),在四點(diǎn)半的時(shí)候,姨媽領(lǐng)著迪克走進(jìn)了廚房。她交給迪克一塊精美的蛋糕和一把刀子,并對他說:“喏,迪克,給你刀子,把這塊蛋糕一切為二,給你妹妹一塊。不過,你得記住要做得像一個紳士那樣。”迪克問:“像一個紳士?紳士怎樣做呢?”

  他姨媽馬上回答說:“紳士總是把大的一塊讓給別人的。”

  迪克說了一聲“噢”。他對此想了一會,然后,他把蛋糕拿給妹妹,并對她說:“凱瑟琳,你來把這塊蛋糕一切為二吧。”

  關(guān)于健康的英語笑話:He Won

  Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.

  Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?

  Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.

  他贏了

  湯姆:約翰尼,你小弟弟好嗎?

  約翰尼:他害病臥床了。他受了傷。

  湯姆:真糟糕,怎么回事兒?

  約翰尼:我們做游戲,看誰能把身子探出窗外最遠(yuǎn),他贏了。

  關(guān)于健康的英語笑話:I Have His Ear in My Pocket

  Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?"

  "A kid bit me," replied Ivan.

  "Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.

  "I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."

  他的耳朵在我衣兜里

  伊凡鼻子流著血回到家里。他媽媽問,“發(fā)生了什么事?”

  “一個男孩咬了我一口,”伊凡說。

  “再見到他你能認(rèn)出來嗎?”媽媽問。

  “他走到哪里我都能認(rèn)出他,”伊凡說。“他的耳朵還在我衣兜里呢。”

  關(guān)于健康的英語笑話:A Good Boy

  Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"

  "I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.

  "You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"

  "She is the one who sells the candy."

  好孩子

  小羅伯特向媽媽要兩分錢。

  “昨天給你的錢干什么了?”

  “我給了一個可憐的老太婆,”他回答說。 “你真是個好孩子,”媽媽驕傲地說。“再給你兩分錢??赡銥槭裁磳δ俏焕咸敲锤信d趣呢?”

  “她是個賣糖果的。”

  關(guān)于健康的英語笑話:Drunk

  One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."

  "But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"

  醉酒

  一天,父親與小兒子一道回家。這個孩子正處于那種對什么事都很感興趣的年齡,老是有提不完的問題。他向父親發(fā)問道:“爸爸,‘醉’字是什么意思?” “唔,孩子,”父親回答說,“你瞧那兒站著兩個警察。如果我把他們看成了四個,那么我就算醉了。” “可是,爸爸, ”孩子說,“那兒只有一個警察呀!”

  關(guān)于健康的英語笑話:Hospitality

  The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.

  好客

  由于客人在吃蘋果餡餅時(shí),家里沒有奶酪了,于是女主人向大家表示歉意。這家的小男孩悄悄地離開了屋子。過了一會兒,他拿著一片奶酪回到房間,把奶酪放在客人的盤子里。 客人微笑著把奶酪放進(jìn)嘴里說:“孩子,你的眼睛就是比你媽媽的好。你在哪里找到的奶酪?” “在捕鼠夾上,先生。”那小男孩說。

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