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學(xué)習(xí)啦>學(xué)習(xí)英語(yǔ)>英語(yǔ)閱讀>英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)>

最簡(jiǎn)單的英語(yǔ)冷笑話(huà)精選

時(shí)間: 韋彥867 分享

  笑話(huà)一般指短小、滑稽的故事,是一種民間口頭創(chuàng)作形式,在民間文化中以口口相傳的形式傳播。學(xué)習(xí)啦小編整理了最簡(jiǎn)單的英語(yǔ)冷笑話(huà),歡迎閱讀!

  最簡(jiǎn)單的英語(yǔ)冷笑話(huà):Ventriloquist

  A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and stops to entertain at a bar in a small town. He's going through his usual run of silly blonde jokes when a big blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and says,

  "OK jerk, I've heard just about enough of your denigrating blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What do a person's physical attributes have to do with their worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in my community, of reaching my full potential as a person...

  because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against not only blondes but women at large... all in the name of humor."

  Flustered, the ventriloquist begins to apologize, when the blonde pipes up, "You stay out of this mister, I'm talking to that little fucker on your knee!"

  最簡(jiǎn)單的英語(yǔ)冷笑話(huà):There Is No Fish There

  One cold Winter day, a blonde decides she wants to take up ice fishing. When she gets to the pond, she begins to cut a hole in the ice. As she does, she hears a voice. "There's no fish there...".

  Puzzled, the blonde picks up her stuff and cuts another hole a few feet away. Again, she hears the voice. "There's no fish there..."

  The blonde is confused, but still determined. About 10 feet away, she begins to cut another ice hole. "There's no fish there...", she hears.

  She immediately turns her head to the sky and says, "Is that you, God?"

  "NO! IT'S THE MANAGER OF THE ICE-SKATING RINK! THERE'S NO FISH THERE!"

  最簡(jiǎn)單的英語(yǔ)冷笑話(huà):Indecent Exposure

  A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open, exposing one of her breasts. A nearby policeman approaches her and remarks, "Ma'am, are you aware that I could cite you for indecent exposure?" "Why, officer?" asks the blonde. "Because your blouse is open and your breast is exposed." "Oh my goodness," exclaims the blonde, "I left my baby on the bus!"

  最簡(jiǎn)單的英語(yǔ)冷笑話(huà):Because I'm Blonde?

  A girl came skipping home from school one day.

  "Mommy, Mommy," she yelled, "we were counting today, and all the other

  kids could only count to four, but I counted to 10. See? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5,

  6, 7, 8, 9, 10!"

  "Very good," said her mother.

  "Is it because I'm blonde?" the girl said.

  "Yes, it's because you're blonde," said the mommy.

  The next day the girl came skipping home from school. "Mommy, Mommy,"

  she yelled, "we were saying the alphabet today, and all the other kids

  could only say it to D, but I said it to G. See? A, B, C, D, E, F, G!"

  "Very good," said her mother.

  "Is it because I'm blonde, Mommy?"

  "Yes, it's because you're blonde."

  The next day the girl came skipping home from school. Mommy, Mommy,"

  she yelled, "we were in gym class today, and when we showered, all the

  other girls had flat chests, but I have these!" And she lifted her tank

  top to reveal a pair of 36Cs.

  "Very good," said her embarrassed mother.

  "Is it because I'm blonde, mommy?"

  "No Honey, it's because you're 24."

  最簡(jiǎn)單的英語(yǔ)冷笑話(huà):Guessing Game

  Two blondes are walking down a road, one has a large sports bag.

  1st blonde: "What have you got in that bag?"

  2nd blonde: "Chickens."

  1st blonde: "If I can guess how many chickens you've got in that bag, can I have one of them?"

  2nd blonde: "If you can guess how many chickens I've got in this bag, you can have BOTH of them!!"

  1st blonde: "Well, I think you've got three."

  
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