簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話帶翻譯大全
簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話帶翻譯大全
笑話是現(xiàn)代社會(huì)發(fā)展最快的一種口頭文學(xué)體裁,它體現(xiàn)了某一民族行為中最深刻的和潛意識(shí)中的觀點(diǎn);笑話能反映出一個(gè)民族的價(jià)值系統(tǒng)及其對(duì)周圍世界肯定和否定的態(tài)度。學(xué)習(xí)啦小編整理了簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話帶翻譯,歡迎閱讀!
簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話帶翻譯:Talking clock
While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into theden(私室,賊窩) . What is the big brass gong(鑼) and hammer for? one of his friends asked. That is the talking clock, the man replied. How's it work?
Watch, the man said and proceeded to give the gong an ear shattering pound with the hammer. Suddenly, someone screamed from the other side of the wall, Knock it off, you idiot! It's two o'clock in the morning!
會(huì)說話的鐘
一個(gè)學(xué)生帶他朋友們參觀他的新公寓,甚是得意。那個(gè)大銅鑼和錘子是干什么用的?他的一個(gè)朋友問他。那玩意兒厲害了,那是一個(gè)會(huì)說話的鐘,學(xué)生回答。這鐘怎么工作的,他的朋友問??粗瑒e眨眼了,那學(xué)生走上前一把操起銅鑼和錘子,拼命地敲了一下,聲音震耳欲聾。突然,他們聽到隔壁墻那邊有人狂叫,別敲了,你這白癡!現(xiàn)在是凌晨?jī)牲c(diǎn)鐘了!
簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話帶翻譯:Your Coat Is on Fire
The master, to impress on his pupils the need of thinking before speaking, told them to count fifty before saying anything important, and one hundred if it was very important.
The next day he was speaking, standing with his back to the fire, when he noticed several lips moving rapidly. Suddenly the whole class shouted: Ninety-eight, ninety-nine, a hundred. Your coat is on fire, sir!
您的大衣著火了
老師為了讓學(xué)生記住先思考后發(fā)言,告訴他們?cè)谡f出重要事情之前先數(shù)到50,如果是特別重要的事情,要先數(shù)到100。 第二天,當(dāng)老師背靠著火爐講課時(shí),發(fā)現(xiàn)好幾個(gè)學(xué)生的嘴唇在很快地不停地動(dòng)。突然,全班學(xué)生一起喊道:“九十八,九十九,一百。老師,您的大衣著火了!”
簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話帶翻譯:Rope or Ox 到底是繩子還是公牛
The man in the prison asked a new comer why he was sent there. The new comer answered: I am out of luck, I think. A few days ago I was walking in the street when I saw a piece of dirty rope. I thought nobody wanted it and so I picked it up and took it home. But it is not against the law to pick up a piece of rope and take home! I told you I had bad luck, didn't I? the man sighed, The trouble is that I didn't notice there was an ox at the other end of that rope.
繩子還是公牛? 在監(jiān)獄里,一個(gè)人問新來的犯人為什么被關(guān)進(jìn)來。新來的犯人回答說:“我想我真是倒霉。幾天前我在街上走的時(shí)候,看到一根臟繩子,以為沒人要了,便撿起來帶了回家。” “但是,撿一根繩子帶回家并不犯法啊!” “我告訴過你我倒霉了吧?”那個(gè)人嘆了口氣,“麻煩的就是我沒有注意到繩子的那一頭還有一頭公牛。”
簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話帶翻譯:A Dying Man's Favorite Cookies
An elderly man lay dying in his bed. In death's agony, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite chocolate chip cookies wafting up the stairs. He gathered his remaining strength, and lifted himself from the bed. Leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and with even greater effort forced himself down the stairs, gripping the railing with both hands. With labored breath, he leaned against the door frame, gazing into the kitchen.
Were it not for death's agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven: there, spread out upon newspapers on the kitchen table were literally hundreds of his favorite chocolate chip cookies. Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of heroic love from his devoted wife, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man?
Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself toward the table, landing on his knees in arumpled posture. His parched lips parted; the wondrous taste of the cookie was already in his mouth; seemingly bringing him back to life. The agedand withered hand, shockingly made its way to a cookie at the edge of the table, when it was suddenly smackedwith a spatula by his wife.
Stay out of those, she said, they're for the funeral.
臨死者最愛吃的小甜餅
一位瀕臨死亡的老人正躺在他的床上,承受著死亡的煎熬。突然一股香味順著樓下飄了上來,那正是他最喜歡的巧克力小薄餅的味道。他用盡吃奶的力氣掙扎著從床上爬了起來,倚著墻,慢慢地走出了臥室,并且用最后的力量用雙手抓住扶手走下了樓梯。老人靠在門框上,嘴里喘著氣,眼睛凝神著廚房。
如果不是因?yàn)槌惺苤R死的痛苦,老人會(huì)認(rèn)為自己到了天堂。那里,在廚房鋪著報(bào)紙的桌子上,確切地說有數(shù)百個(gè)他最喜歡吃的巧克力小薄餅。真在天堂嗎?還是他那離婚妻子的最后一次英雄般的愛心顯示,以便讓他開心地離開這個(gè)世界?
集中最后的力量,老人跪著雙膝掙扎著移向桌子。他口干舌燥,嘴巴張開。他感受到了美妙的甜餅味道,仿佛要將他帶回人世。他的一只年邁干癟的手顫顫悠悠地伸向桌子邊緣的一只小甜餅。突然,他妻子扔過一把鏟子,砸在他的手上。
“離遠(yuǎn)點(diǎn)”,他妻子說。“這是為你的葬禮準(zhǔn)備的。”
簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話帶翻譯:Guns Buried in the Garden
An old man lived alone in Northern Ireland. His only son was in prison. The old man wanted to plant some potatoes in his garden but he didn't know anyone who would help him plow up the garden.
He wrote to his son about it, and received this reply, For HEAVENS SAKE, don't dig up that garden, that's where I buried the GUNS!
At 4 AM the next morning, a dozen British soldiers showed up and dug up the entire garden, but didn't find any guns.
Confused, the man wrote to his son telling him what happened and asking him what to do next.
His son's reply was: Just plant your potatoes.
埋在花園里的槍
一個(gè)老人獨(dú)居在北愛爾蘭,他的獨(dú)生子正在坐牢。老人想在花園里種些土豆,但不知道誰(shuí)可以幫忙把泥土翻松。他寫信想兒子提及此事,兒子回信說道:“看在上帝的面上,千萬不要翻松花園的泥土,我把槍埋在那兒了。”
第二天凌晨4點(diǎn),一隊(duì)英國(guó)士兵出現(xiàn)在老人家中,在花園把土地翻遍,但并沒有找到任何槍支。”
老人寫信告訴兒子這件奇怪的事情,問到底發(fā)生了什么事情,下一步應(yīng)該怎么做。
兒子回信道:“你只管種土豆好了。”
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