關(guān)于短篇英語笑話精選
關(guān)于短篇英語笑話精選
笑話使人們在刻板的生活中感到一絲快意和放松。與此同時,笑話也是人們反對極權(quán)和專制制度的有力武器。學(xué)習(xí)啦小編分享關(guān)于短篇英語笑話,希望可以幫助大家!
關(guān)于短篇英語笑話:Work Smarter, Not Harder
A clergyman, walking down a country lane, sees a young farmer struggling to reload a cart that had lost its load of hay. "You look hot, my son," said the cleric. "Why don't you rest a moment and then I'll give you a hand?" "No, thanks," said the young boy. "My father wouldn't like it." "Don't be silly," the minister said. "Everyone is entitled to a break. Come, have a drink of water. Rest in the shade." Again the young man protested. "Oh, no, sir. My father would be real mad!" Losing his patience, the clergyman said, "Your father must be a real slave driver. Tell me where I can find him; I'll give him a piece of my mind!" The young farmer replied, "He's right there under that pile of hay!"
關(guān)于短篇英語笑話:Biggest Sex Life Lie
A minister passed a group of teenaged boys sitting on the church lawn. "Evening, boys. What are you doing?"
"Nothing much, Pastor," replied the one lad. "We're just seeing who can tell the biggest lie about his sex life."
"Boys, boys, boys!" intoned the minister. "I'm shocked. When I was your age, I never thought about sex at all."
The boys looked at each other and then said in unison, "You win, Pastor!"
關(guān)于短篇英語笑話:Catholic School
Little Tommy's parents had tried everything to help his math grade: tutors, flash cards, "Hooked on Math," special learning centers, everything. Finally, they enrolled him in the local Catholic school.
The very first day, he came home with a very serious look on his face, went straight to his room, and started studying. His mother was amazed. Books and paper were spread out everywhere and Little Tommy was hard at work. As soon as dinner was through, he marched right back up to his room without a word and studied some more. This went on for weeks until Little Tommy proudly brought home his report card and showed it to his parents:
An A in Math! "Tommy! This is great! I'm so proud of you! Son, what was it? What helped motivate you? Was it the nuns?" Little Tommy shook his head.
"Well, then, was it the books? The discipline? The structure? The uniforms? What?" Little Tommy looked at her and said, "Well, Mom, it's like this.
When I saw that guy out in the lobby nailed to a plus sign, I knew they weren't screwing around!"
關(guān)于短篇英語笑話:Throw It All Into A River
A preacher, completing a temperance sermon, spoke with great fervor! "If I had all the beer in the world, I'd throw it all into the river."
With greater emphasis, he said, "And if I had all the wine in the world, I'd throw it all into the river."
And finally he said, "And if I had all the whiskey in the world, I'd throw it all into the river, too!"
As he took his chair, the song leader stood and announced with a smile, "For our closinghymn, let us sing number 365:"
"Shall We Gather at the River."
關(guān)于短篇英語笑話:Fallen
An old priest got sick of everyone in his parish confessing adultery. During one Sunday's sermon he told them, "If one more person confesses to adultery, I'll quit!"
Since everyone liked him, they decided to use a code word: "fallen." >From then on, anyone who had committed adultery said they had "fallen." This satisfied the old priest and the parishioners, and everything was fine for years, until finally the old priest passed away at the ripe old age of 93.
Shortly after the new young priest settled in, he paid a call on the mayor. The priest was quite concerned. "You have to do something about the sidewalks in this town, Mayor. You can't believe how many people come into the confessional talking about having fallen!" The mayor started to laugh, realizing that no one had explained their code word to the new priest.
But before the mayor could explain, the priest shook his finger at the mayor and said, "I don't know why you're laughing; your wife fell three times last week!"
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