英語(yǔ)課前一分鐘笑話大全
笑話一般比較短小,喜劇性很強(qiáng),普遍存在于人們的日常生活中。笑話的娛樂作用可以減輕人的心理壓力,促進(jìn)身體健康。下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編帶來(lái)的課前一分鐘英語(yǔ)笑話，歡迎閱讀!
課前一分鐘英語(yǔ)笑話篇一
An open-book exam 開卷考試
On the day of our final exam at my Community College in Santa Maria, Calif., we heard that the bookstore had changed its policy and would buy back our business-management textbooks. Before class, several of us dashed over to the store and sold our books. We were seated and waiting for the test when our professor announced that considering the difficulty of the final, it would be an open-book exam.
我在加利福尼亞的圣瑪麗亞市一所社區(qū)大學(xué)讀書。期末考試那天，聽說書店在回購(gòu)我們的工商管理課本?？荚嚽?，我們幾個(gè)趕忙跑到書店把書賣了，隨后，我們坐在教室里等著考試。這時(shí)候教授宣布：考慮到試題的難度，今天的考試我們決定開卷。
課前一分鐘英語(yǔ)笑話篇二
A Promise 承諾
The landlady1 said to the hard-up author: "When will you pay arrears2(拖欠，滯付) of room rent?"
The author replied: "I will pay you as soon as I receive the check that the publisher will send me if he accepts the novel that I am about to start writing when I have found a suitable subject and the necessary inspiration. "
房東太太對(duì)手頭拮據(jù)的作家說：“你欠交的房租什么時(shí)候付清呀?”
作家回答說：“等我找到了合適的主題，也有了必要的靈感，就立即著手寫一本小說。只要出版商接受了，他就會(huì)給我送來(lái)支票。我一收到支票，馬上就付清所欠的房租。”
課前一分鐘英語(yǔ)笑話篇三
He had an idea 想到一個(gè)主意
The speaker1 found2 some people leaving the building during3 the meeting4.
He was5 annoyed6. Then he had7 an idea. When someone8 else started out, the called out to the man:" Wait a minute, I’ll go with you to see what is on the outside, It must be more interesting than what is going9 on here."
會(huì)議上發(fā)言人發(fā)現(xiàn)有人離開會(huì)場(chǎng)。
他感到很惱火，就想出了一個(gè)主意。當(dāng)有人離開時(shí)，他大聲叫住那個(gè)人說：“等一下，我要和你一起去看看外面有什么活動(dòng)，那一定比這里的更有意思。”
課前一分鐘英語(yǔ)笑話篇四
An Accurate Report 準(zhǔn)確的報(bào)道
An editor stuck up a notice above his desk. It read, "Accuracy! Accuracy! Accuracy!" and he always pointed1 it out to the new reporters.
One day a young reporter came to hand in his report of a public meeting. The editor read it through and noticed the sentence, "Three thousand nine hundred and ninety-nine eyes werefixed2 upon the speaker."
He demanded angrily, "What do you mean by making a stupid mistake like that?" The reporter protested, "But it's not a mistake. There was a one-eyed man in the audience."
有個(gè)主編在他的辦公桌的上方貼了一條標(biāo)語(yǔ)，寫著“準(zhǔn)確”“ 準(zhǔn)確”“準(zhǔn)確!”而且總是向新來(lái)的記者指出它。
有一天，有個(gè)年輕的記者交給他一篇關(guān)于一個(gè)公眾大會(huì)的報(bào)道。主編認(rèn)真審閱時(shí)注意到有一句話是“三千九百九十九只眼睛都注視著發(fā)言的人。”
他就很生氣的責(zé)問到：“犯了這么愚蠢的錯(cuò)誤。你怎么搞的嘛?”記者申辯道：“這可不是錯(cuò)誤，聽眾中有一個(gè)人是瞎了一只眼睛的。”
課前一分鐘英語(yǔ)笑話篇五
Allergy 過敏性反應(yīng)
A political speaker was annoyed by a man in the audience. The man coughed and sneezed and blew his nose almost constantly.
Finally the speaker was unable to stand it. He very politely said to the man: "You are having so much discomfort1. If you go out to the open air, it might be good for your cold."
The man replied: "I haven't any cold. I'm just allergic2 to lies."
一位政治演說家被聽眾中的一個(gè)人煩擾得非常惱火。這個(gè)人幾乎不停地咳嗽、打噴嚏、擼鼻子。
最后演說家忍不住了，他很客氣地對(duì)這個(gè)人說：“你感到這么難受，如果到戶外去，可能對(duì)你的感冒有好處。”
這個(gè)人回答說：“我沒有什么感冒。我只是聽到有人撒謊就過敏。”
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