幽默英文小笑話
笑話作為一種城市化的民間口頭創(chuàng)作體裁,是一種重要的交際手段。在俄羅斯文化中,笑話一直都具有無法替代的特殊意義。下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編帶來的幽默英文小笑話，歡迎閱讀!
幽默英文小笑話篇一
Problem with Gas放屁的問題
A little old lady goes to the doctor ... and says, "Doctor, I have this problem with gas, but it doesn't really bother me too much. They never smell and are always silent.
有位小老太太去看醫(yī)生：“醫(yī)生，我有愛放屁的毛病。其實(shí)也不是大問題，只是我放屁不臭而且沒聲音。
As a matter of fact, I've farted at least 20 times since I've been here in your office. You didn't know I was farting because they don't smell and are silent."
事實(shí)上，我在這里已經(jīng)放了20多個(gè)屁，但是你并不知道對(duì)吧，因?yàn)槲业钠ú怀?，而且還沒聲音。”
The doctor says, "I see. Here's a prescription. Take these pills 3 times a day for seven days and come back to see me next week."
醫(yī)生說：“好的，我明白了。吃這個(gè)藥片，一天三次連續(xù)吃七天，下星期你再來。”
The next week the lady goes back. "Doctor," she says, "I don't know what the hell you gave me, but now my farts ... although still silent... stink terribly."
一星期后老太太來了，“醫(yī)生，你到底給的我什么藥，現(xiàn)在我放屁還是沒聲音，但是怎么這么臭!”
The doctor says, "Good! Now that we've cleared up your sinuses, let's start working on your hearing."
醫(yī)生說：“太好了!你的嗅覺正常了，現(xiàn)在開始治聽覺。”
幽默英文小笑話篇二
Psychiatrist 精神病醫(yī)生
Jerry went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I've got trouble.
杰瑞去看精神病醫(yī)生。“醫(yī)生，我有些不對(duì)勁。
Every time I get into bed, I think there's somebody under it. I'm going crazy!" Just put yourself in my hands for one year," said the shrink. "Come to me three times a week, and I'll cure your fears." How much do you charge?" A hundred dollars per visit." I'll sleep on it," said Jerry.
每次睡覺的時(shí)候，我都感覺有人在床下。我要瘋了!”“給我一年時(shí)間，”醫(yī)生說，“每周來三次，我會(huì)治好你。”“費(fèi)用是多少呢?”“每次一百美元。”“我會(huì)認(rèn)真考慮的。”杰瑞答道。
Six months later the doctor met Jerry on the street. "Why didn't you ever come to see me again?" asked the psychiatrist.
六個(gè)月后醫(yī)生和杰瑞在街上相遇了，“為什么你再也沒來呢?”醫(yī)生問。
For a hundred bucks a visit? The bartender cured me for ." "Is that so! How?" He told me to cut the legs off the bed!" Ain't nobody under there now!!!
“一次一百塊錢嗎?有個(gè)酒吧服務(wù)生收了十塊錢就把我治好了。”“真的?他怎么做到的?”“他讓我把床腿鋸掉。現(xiàn)在那沒人了!”
幽默英文小笑話篇三
Space mountain太空山
Our seven - year - old daughter was thrilled when we took her to disney world for the first time and headed straight for space mountain
我們第一次帶我們七歲的女兒去迪斯尼樂園并直接去太空山時(shí)，她十分激動(dòng)。
I worried that the roller coaster would be too scary for her , but she insisted
我擔(dān)心過山車對(duì)她來說太刺激，她卻堅(jiān)持要玩。
To her delight, we rode it twice.
使她高興的是，我們玩了兩次。
The next year we returned to the Magic Kingdom and my daughter, now eight, again dragged me to Space Mountain.
第二年我們帶著八歲的她重返神奇王國時(shí)，她又拉我們?nèi)ヌ丈健?/p>
然而這次，當(dāng)我們站在線外時(shí)，我看到她很冷靜認(rèn)真地看完關(guān)于過山車速度的游客警告標(biāo)志牌，說：“爸爸，我不想玩這個(gè)了”。我問她為什么去年敢玩，今年反而害怕了，她說：“今年，我識(shí)字了。”
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