英語幽默笑話大全爆笑
英語幽默笑話大全爆笑
笑話是幽默的語言表達(dá)。它是一種常見的幽默傳達(dá)方式。下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編帶來的爆笑英語幽默笑話大全，歡迎閱讀!
爆笑英語幽默笑話大全精選
是他的錯(cuò) Its His Fault
Its His Fault
是他的錯(cuò)
Billy and Bobby were brothers, and they often had fights with each other.
比利和波比是兩兄弟，兩人經(jīng)常打架。
Last Saturday their mother said to them, "I'm going to cook our lunch now. Go out and play in the garden - and be good."
上個(gè)星期六，他們的媽媽對(duì)他們說：“我現(xiàn)在要做午飯了。去，到花園去玩吧，別淘氣。”
"Yes, Mummy." the two boys answered, and they went out.
“是，媽媽。”兩個(gè)男孩回答，然后他們就出去了。
They played in the garden for half an hour, and then Billy ran into the kitchen, "Mummy, " he said, "Bobby's broken a window in Mrs. Allens' house."
他們?cè)诨▓@里玩了半個(gè)小時(shí)，然后比利跑進(jìn)了廚房。“媽媽，”他說：“ 波比打碎了艾倫太太家的窗玻璃。”
"He's a bad boy," his mother said. "How did he break it?"
“他是個(gè)壞孩子。”他媽媽說。“他是怎么把玻璃打碎的?”
"I threw a stone at him," Billy answered,"and he quickly ducked.".
“我朝他扔了一塊石子，”比利回答：“他蹲下了。”
爆笑英語幽默笑話大全閱讀
Never Mind
坐到了后坐上
A drunk phoned police to report that thieves had been in his car. "They've stolen thedashboard, the steering wheel, even the brake pedal!" he cried out.
一個(gè)醉漢打電話給警察局，報(bào)告小偷光顧了他的車，“他們偷走了儀表盤、方向盤，甚至連剎車腳板都偷走了。”
However, before the police investigation could start, the phone rang a second time "Nevermind," the drunk said with a hiccup, "I got in the back seat by mistake."
然而在警察還沒有開始調(diào)查時(shí)，電話又一次響了起來，“沒事了”，醉漢打著嗝說，“我不小心坐到了后坐上。”
爆笑英語幽默笑話大全學(xué)習(xí)
一個(gè)有效的方法 Useful Way
Useful Way
一個(gè)有效的方法
Father: Jack, why do you drink so much water?
爸爸：杰克，你干嘛喝這么多水呀?
Jack: I have just had an apple, Dad.
杰克：我剛才吃了個(gè)蘋果，爸爸。
Father: What's that got to do with it?
爸爸：可是這跟喝水有什么關(guān)系呢?
Jack: I forgot to wash the apple.
杰克：我忘了洗蘋果呀。
爆笑英語幽默笑話大全欣賞
A Present
凱特的禮物
Kate: Mom, do you know what I'm going to give you for your birthday?
凱特：媽媽，你知道我要給你一件什么生日禮物嗎?
Mom: No, Honey, what?
媽媽：不知道，寶貝，是什么呀?
Kate: A nice teapot.
凱特：一把漂亮的茶壺。
Mom: But I've got a nice teapot.
媽媽：可是我已經(jīng)有一把漂亮的茶壺了呀。
Kate: No, you haven't. I've just dropped it.
凱特：不，你沒有了。我剛剛把它給摔了。
爆笑英語幽默笑話大全品味
Always Thirsty
總感到口渴
"I had an operation," said a man to his friend, "and the doctor left a sponge in me."
一個(gè)男人對(duì)他的朋友說：“我動(dòng)了一次手術(shù)，手術(shù)后醫(yī)生把一塊海綿忘在我的身體里了。”
"That's terrible!" said the friend. "Got any pain?"
“真是太糟糕了!”朋友說道：“你覺得疼嗎?”
"No, but I am always thirsty!"
“不疼，可是我總感到口渴。”
爆笑英語幽默笑話大全摘抄
A Soldier's Brilliant Idea
士兵坐飛機(jī)有美女陪伴的高招
Mr. Robinson had to travel somewhere on business, and as he was in a hurry, he decided to go by air. He liked sitting beside a window when he was flying, so when he got on to the plane, he looked for a window seat. He found all of them had already had been taken except for one. There was a soldier sitting in the seat beside this one, and Mr. Robinson was surprised that he had not taken the one by the window; but, anyhow, he at once went towards it.
由于生意方面的事，羅賓遜先生得出趟門。因?yàn)橛悬c(diǎn)緊急，他決定坐飛機(jī)。乘機(jī)旅行時(shí)，他喜歡靠窗坐，故而一登機(jī)，他就尋找一個(gè)靠窗的座位。他發(fā)現(xiàn)只有一個(gè)靠窗的座位還空著。在那空座位邊坐著一名士兵。令羅賓遜先生納悶的是，這位士兵沒有坐靠窗的位置。羅賓遜先生不管那些，他馬上徑直朝那個(gè)空座位走去。
When he reached it, however, he saw that there was a notice on it. It was written in ink and said, "This seat is preserved for proper load balance, thank you." Mr Robinson had never seen such an unusual notice in a plane before, but he thought that the plane must be carrying something particularly heavy in it, so he walked on and found another empty seat, not beside a window, to sit in.
然而，等到了那兒，他看見座位上有則啟事，是用鋼筆寫的：“為保持裝載平衡，特預(yù)設(shè)該位置，謝謝合作。”羅賓遜先生還從來沒有在飛機(jī)上見過如此不同尋常的啟事。不過，他想飛機(jī)上一定裝了什么特別重的物品，于是他找了個(gè)不靠窗的位置。
Two or three people tried to sit in the window seat beside the soldier, but they too read the notice and went on, when the plane was nearly full, a very beautiful girl hurried into the plane. The soldier, who was watching the passengers coming in, quickly took the notice off the seat beside himself and in this way succeededin having the company of the girl during the whole trip.
又有兩三個(gè)乘客試圖坐在那個(gè)士兵旁的靠窗座位上，他們看到那則啟事就走開了。當(dāng)快滿座時(shí)，一位非常美麗的姑娘匆匆走進(jìn)機(jī)艙。一直在注意進(jìn)艙旅客的那個(gè)士兵趕緊拿掉他旁邊空座位上的啟事。士兵用這種辦法，成功地找到了一位姑娘一路作伴。