大學(xué)英語優(yōu)秀作文簡評
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大學(xué)英語優(yōu)秀作文簡評：Newspapers and a Medium of the Past
It was on the morning of 12th, Sep. On hearing that an unbelievable catastrophe had happened in New York, I rushed to a news stand and anxiously asked for a copy of newspaper, only to be told that they had already been sold out. Though I knew the details of the disaster on TV later the day, I still bought a pile of newspapers and read them with gusto. At least to traditional readers like me, newspapers still hold an important position in our heart.
Some people regard newspapers as a medium of the past and predict that they will be replaced by TV and the Internet in the near future. They point out that the two new media have the advantage of promptness and vividness. Through live broadcast of news events, TV viewers can feel that they are on the spot, seeing what's actually happening with their own eyes. As far as I'm concerned, however, newspapers may provide the readers with factual reports as well as certain viewpoint. When people argue that with the development of the Internet, people now have an easier access to news media through PDAs, mobile phones and PCs. Wherever one wants to know what's happening in the world, he no longer needs to bother searching for a bookstore.Instead, he would surf online and find exactly what he wants on a website.
However, there are more people, me included, firmly hold the opinion that newspapers are still indispensable to our life.First of all, Newspapers gain us a deeper insights into the events. A well-written report, reasonable and forceful, probing into the core of the topic, provoke our thoughts on such issues as morality, justice, value and so on. While TV feasts our eyes with flash pictures, newspapers enrich our minds with sparkling wits. Secondly, though with great potential, the new media are not as popular as newspapers. A retired worker would rather buy an evening paper on his way home, instead of taking pains to learn how to operate a PC. A senior manager would prefer to skip through a Wall Street Daily rather than waste his precious time in front of a TV on the bus set. Last but not the least, people like to read newspapers just out of habit. They prefer the lovely smell of a newly printed newspaper to computer screen which makes their heads spin. They want to see words in black and white, and keep them after reading, if necessary.
Considering the fact that radios have not been driven out of the market by TV, and book sales not affected by the invention of e-book, I would draw the conclusion that despite the increasing popularity of new media, newspapers still play an important role in people's life.
簡 評
學(xué)生常常感到寫作最困難的莫過于開頭。經(jīng)常是苦思冥想，抓耳撓腮，卻苦無始句。實際上，文章開頭并沒有固定的格式。只需把主題引出，即把全文的論點引出，任何寫法都可以。本文作者以自身的經(jīng)歷開頭，親切平實，形象生動，真實可信，很容易引起讀者的共鳴，從而鋪陳全文主旨。常用的開篇方式還有很多，如引用名人名言，列舉一組令人震驚的數(shù)據(jù)，定義某個術(shù)語，引出辯論的正反觀點等等，也可以像本文這樣采用一段真人佚事或編纂一個故事。
另外，本篇文章有一定的篇幅，論述詳盡，分析比較了報紙與新生媒體形式如電視、網(wǎng)絡(luò)的各自優(yōu)勢。這是一篇比較類的文章。一般說來，此類文章可采用獨立闡述對比事物或交替說明對比事物兩種方式。本文采用了后者。作者穿插介紹了電視的形象生動、如臨其境，網(wǎng)絡(luò)的快捷以及傳統(tǒng)報紙的休閑和導(dǎo)向性。
(點評教師：趙蓉)
大學(xué)英語優(yōu)秀作文簡評：基因破譯是希望還是害怕
Decoding of Genes: Hope or Dread?
Can a person live up to 12007 It must be viewed as a ridiculous question just several years ago. But now, two years after the completion of mapping the human genetic code, some researchers predict that this may eventually come true in the future. On June 26th, 2000, the Human Genetic Project (HGP),an international organization specializing in research of human genes, announced that 97% of the human genomes had already been decoded and any utilization of the related gene map would be completely free. The news immediately made a sensation throughout the world and even today, the discussion over the controversial application of the gene map and the related genetic tech seems to be forever on the wing. Undoubtedly, the completion of the human gene map marks a milestone in our quest about nature and ourselves, but the point is what this breakthrough will bring to us all:hope or dread?
Perhaps the most promising aspect of genetic tech lies in an impending medical revolution it will incur, as many people now believe in that it serves as a new approach to control various diseases, to produce organs for transplantation or to slow down the aging process. What's more, its feasibility to be adopted and incorporated into medical procedures has a good prospect. Visualize one of our regular calls at hospital in the future, using only a blood sample, doctors can easily detect genes of hereditary diseases and mutations concerned, and follow up with a genetic therapy to eliminate mutated genes and thus the disease itself. Theoretically, by reorganizing our genes to the optimum pattern,man's life span can be prolonged to large extent.
Besides the revolution it will bring in the medical field, genetic tech will also accelerate the development of a number of other scientific branches, biology among them, by providing scientists with a brand new perspective in terms of genes. For example, by comparing human genomes with those of other species, anthropologists may acquire more profound knowledge about human evolution.
However, before people cheer for the hope genetic tech bellows, we might have already found us bogged down in so many ethical dilemmas. Let's take the following into consideration. If everyone lives for 1200 years, then the world population must explode. How can our earth stand that? If parents could examine the genes of their baby before its birth, then who can decide what kind of baby should be born, while some others shouldn't?If we understand bird genes, probably we will someday soar in the sky by having our own wings. But what if we understand those of tigers, wolves or insects? Seems that those Hollywood thrillers have made a good prophecy. If everyone's genetic data is open to public inspection, then how can we protect our privacy? And moreover, will discrimination, invasion, or plunder of certain genes take place? And worst of all, if life of an individual can be precisely predicted the moment he is born or even prior,like he will die of lung cancer or he will develop kleptomania in his teens, then where is the fun of life? We may lose life's uncertainty, the hope that we can strive for something better as well as the belief that we can hold in hands our own destiny. We may lose all these. Are we nothing but genes? Or do we have something more than that? Such ethical and psychological puzzles will continue to haunt the human society.
Nevertheless, the completion of the gene map is just the initial step of the entire genetic research. What will this step mean to us? A scientist once made an analogy, it is just like that you are faced with a version of The Collected Works of Shakespeare in which there is no punctuation mark, no space between words,and what's more, you cannot understand English at all! What will happen with genetic tech in hundreds of years is quite beyond our current perception. But one thing we should always bear in mind, science is for the welfare of human being. So I believe genetic tech will bring us a better tomorrow, although we may come across much hardship on the tortuous road leading to this goal.
簡 評
基因破譯的新聞引起了世界的嘩然。這一事實意味著什么?它給社會的倫理、道德將帶來怎樣的沖擊?沒有人能預(yù)知未來，而這一基因?qū)W的碩果將造福人類，還是帶給人類一場浩劫?這也是對人性的考問。
文章的論題對于普通讀者來說是晦澀難懂的，冒雯雯同學(xué)恰當(dāng)?shù)夭捎昧死C的手法來闡述基因?qū)W這一發(fā)現(xiàn)的意義。而一個未知領(lǐng)域往往帶給人困惑和恐懼。冒雯雯同學(xué)在文章中大篇幅的發(fā)問正是這種困惑的表達(dá)。第四段由8個問句構(gòu)成，其中前六個問句指出了人類將要面對的六種困惑，后兩個問句概括論述指出，“Are we nothing but genes?Or do we have something more than that?Such ethical and psychological puzzles will continue to haunt the humansociety.”文章多處采納問句的表達(dá)方式，使論述有力，發(fā)人深省，震撼讀者的心。
文章在結(jié)尾用一個恰當(dāng)?shù)谋扔鱽斫忉尰驅(qū)W的發(fā)現(xiàn)，使原本晦澀難懂的基因?qū)W，以形象、貼切、易理解的方式被表達(dá)出來，也是文章的點睛之筆。
(點評教師：盧愛華)
大學(xué)英語優(yōu)秀作文簡評：報紙和互聯(lián)網(wǎng)
21st Century: Newspapers Vs. Internet
The advent of mass printing in the lbth century has once brought about magnificent influence to the world both socially and politically. A piece of newspaper in hand, one could be in formed of what was happening around the world even without having to get out of his armchair. Nowadays, however, the role of newspaper is being seriously challenged by the booming IT industry or world wide web, satellites, optic-cables, to name just a few. As a matter of fact, In today's world where nearly every thing starts with an "e", newspaper will be replaced by other computer based means.
First of all, newspaper can never match internet in its speed. Actually, information of any kind can be transported digitally at up to 300,000,000 meters per second. In a world of efficiency, newspaper can be defeated for this reason solely.
Besides, with internet, information can be transmitted 3 dimentional, which consists of sound, live show and even interaction. Whereas in the paper, only words and photographs could be presented in news stories. Therefore, the former has been made more vivid and descriptive.
Last but not least, computerizing the process of information dissemination provides us with a more objective and state-of-the art point of view. Through internet, we can obtain every detail we might want to know, which was sometimes unrevealed by newspapers for this or that reason. Obviously, the more accurate the facts are, the more easily an objective opinion can be formed.
In conclusion, though newspaper is still regarded as indispensable for our daily routines,it cannot match internet in many aspects.
簡 評
本文選擇了一個有趣的標(biāo)題形式“2l世紀(jì)：報紙Vs信息”。作者運(yùn)用標(biāo)題表達(dá)了文章的主題思想：2l世紀(jì)網(wǎng)絡(luò)將成為傳統(tǒng)報業(yè)的強(qiáng)勁對手。
另一個值得注意的是，在不足30個句子的短文中出現(xiàn)了10處被動句，作者的用意應(yīng)該是十分明顯的。如開篇以并列形式出現(xiàn)的“the role Of newspapers is being seriously challenged”，“newspaper will be replaced by other computer based means'’表現(xiàn)了傳統(tǒng)報紙的岌岌可危和將被取而代之的緊迫形式。這一立場在文中的其他部分得到了更一步的強(qiáng)化，頗有大勢所趨，又無可奈何的悲壯。
應(yīng)該說，作者對句式的多樣化比較注意，把握得較好。文中有“the more...the more...”，也運(yùn)用了圓周句即把主要信息置于句首，也運(yùn)用了掉尾句即把句子的主要信息置于句尾，如“As a mater of bet，in today，s world where nearly everything starts with an 'e'，newspaper will be replaced by other computer based means"。
文中有一處引用了數(shù)據(jù)"300，000，000"，而不是用“threehundred million"從而顯示了網(wǎng)絡(luò)信息傳輸速度是為報紙所不可企及的。作者運(yùn)用數(shù)據(jù)來增強(qiáng)文章和論點說服力的這一意識和做法，是值得肯定的。
(點評教師：趙蓉)
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