玩轉托福獨立寫作舉例論證
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什么是舉例論證
例證法是對分論點進行展開的一種非常有效的方法,不同于邏輯論證,它更多偏重對某一種經歷或事實的論述,從自己的“經驗”或社會的“事實”出發(fā),對自己的分論點進行展開或證明。
托福寫作舉例論證的優(yōu)勢
例證法的第一個優(yōu)勢是調節(jié)字數。例證法的一個特點是“生動具體性”,只有將例子填充足夠多的背景和細節(jié)信息,才能夠給讀者帶來充分的“代入感”,從而到達說服人的目的。而細節(jié)的詳略具體程度就可以成為字數調節(jié)的一個工具。在論證部分,如果邏輯論證不好展開或者展開的篇幅比較小,這個時候就可以用一個詳實具體的例子來增加展開的豐滿度;如果邏輯論證本身就足夠詳實,就可以用一個稍微概括性的例子來增加展開。但要注意一點,增加細節(jié)不是沒有重點或無意義地隨意擴充,一定要保證例證與分論點的相關性,具體如何操作,我們會在下文中進行展開。
例證法的第二個優(yōu)勢就是它適用于邏輯性弱以及詞匯貧乏的同學,對于邏輯性弱一點的同學,尤其是年紀比較小的考生,可能本身論理思維沒有那么嚴密,在推導過程中很容易出現邏輯鏈的缺失,或者無法用準確的詞表達出抽象性的概念,所以邏輯展開并不能恰當地運用好;而例證法則可以用相對平實具體的語言描述經歷,從而對分論點進行說明和展開,所以從這個角度來說,它的運用就會更加簡單一些。
托福寫作如何使用例證法
例證法看似簡單,但用的恰當卻并不容易。
一個好的例子應該具備三個特點:相關性,細節(jié)性以及結論性。
l 相關性
例子本身是作為論據的一部分,它最核心的作用就是去證明的分論點,所以例子本身的邏輯和內容必須貼切主題句,也就是分論點。而主題句本身包括主題(topic)和觀點態(tài)度(controlling idea)兩個部分,所以例證本身也是針對于這兩個方面進行例證展開。比如對于Technology has improved people`s living conditions significantly這樣的主題句,它的主題是technology,而觀點態(tài)度是has improved people`s living conditions significantly,所以我們對應將這兩方面進行具體事例擴充:technology擴充為空調(air conditioner), 而improved people`s living conditions significantly可以初步擴充為“空調沒普及的時候,人們在夏天非常難受;空調發(fā)明后,人們在夏天很享受”。
l 細節(jié)性
例證作為論據區(qū)別于邏輯的最大一點在于它是“生動具體”的,給讀者強烈的真實感和共鳴感,所以它必須要填充詳細具體的細節(jié)作為支撐。
細節(jié)填充的第一個原則就是W&H原則,補充when,where,who,why以及how的這些信息;盡量用具體的時間(three years ago; in 1988; when I was in 3 grade等)來替換掉模糊的時間概念(in the past, before等),用具體人名(my cousin John)來替代泛指的人稱(someone, a classmate);
第二個原則要擴充詳細的修飾語,比如對于“我丟了一個帽子”,擴充修飾語就意味著你要補充各類信息,擴充之后就是“我在今天上午等202公交車的時候,把我媽媽給我縫制的紅色毛線帽子丟在了站臺長椅上”,有了足夠多的信息補充,才會讓讀者有身臨其境的代入感。
那對于上一個空調的例子,我們加入足夠多的細節(jié)就變成“在1950s,中國的人們→忍受高溫+甚至在南方引發(fā)高溫病;現在的人們,有空調→終結高溫+室內開涼爽派對空調讓人們在夏天更舒適。”
l 結論性
例子證明也是論證過程,是論證就有分析和結論,所以在例證列舉之后,要加上對分論點的總結和重申。而總結的方法可以用一個簡單的因果鏈,也可以用強調句的形式。
因果:Because of the invention of air conditioner, we can enjoy a delightful summer now.
強調:It is the invention of air conditioner that enables people to enjoy a delightful summer now.
以上整個例子的呈現如下:
Technology has improved people`s living conditions significantly. For instance, in 1950s, people in China had to suffer the extremely high temperature during summer every single year, and in some southern regions, people even got ill caused by the horrible weather sometimes. However, as the technology developed, the invention of air conditioner has ended the intolerable suffering of hot summer, and nowadays people can have parties and gatherings in the cool indoor rooms. Therefore,because of the invention of air conditioner, we can enjoy a delightful summer now.
在進行例子的論證時,一定要記得例子本身最核心的作用是為了證明分論點,務必要緊貼著分論點進行例證展開,同時要補充足夠的細節(jié)從而增加例子的生動具體性,給讀者更多的代入感和真實感,最后就是要利用例子去分析和重申分論點。
托福范文:不應強制規(guī)定必須上課
【題目】
Some people believe that university students should be required to attend classes. Others believe that going to classes should be optional for students. Which point of view do you agree with? Use specific reasons and details to explain your answer.
【范文】Class Attendance Should Not Be Compulsory
It is undoubtedly true that students should take their studies seriously. This means not only doing the required work, but also actively pursuing every opportunity to learn. So of course they should attend their classes to receive the maximum benefit. However, I do not believe that there is a need to make class attendance mandatory at the university level.
By the time they reach university, students are no longer children. They are young adults and should be able to take responsibility for their actions. Attending their classes is of benefit to them, and while it may be tempting to skip them once in a while, it is not the responsible choice. Adults must be able to manage their time on their own and to make their own decisions. If a student misses too many classes and so does poorly in a course, he will have to accept the consequences and learn from his mistake. Finally, non-compulsory class attendance may not only lead to improvements in the students, but also in the teaching. Of course, every professor likes to see full attendance at his classes. If students are not coming to class, the professor should ask himself why. Perhaps the students do not understand the relevance of the material to their studies.
In conclusion, I believe that class attendance should not be required for university students. They should learn to make the right decisions for themselves, and this is one way to encourage the development of independence and responsibility.
[簡譯】不應該強制規(guī)定必須上課
學生應該認真對待自己的學業(yè),這無疑是正確的。這也就意味著,學生不僅要完成學校所要求的功課,也要主動尋求各種學習機會。所以,學生當然應該去上課,以得到最多的益處。然而我認為,到了大學階段,就沒有必要強制規(guī)定學生上課一定要出席。
學生上了大學就不再是小孩子了,他們是年輕的成人,應該有能力為自己的行為負責。上課對他們是有益的,雖然偶爾逃課頗令人心動,但這并不是負責任的選擇。成年人必須能夠管理自己的時間,自己做決定。如果學生因為缺課太多而使某個科目考得很差,他就必須接受后果,從自己的錯誤中吸取教訓。最后,不強制上課可能不僅使學生進步,而且也可改善教學。當然,每位教授都樂于見到自己上課時的學生出席率為百分之百。如果學生不來上課,教授應該捫心自問為什么會如此。或許是因為學生們不了解上課的內容和學業(yè)之間有何關聯。
總之,我認為不應該強制規(guī)定大學生上課必須出席。他們應該學習自己做正確的決定,而這正是鼓勵學生培養(yǎng)獨立精神和責任感的方法之一。
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