讀點(diǎn)笑話學(xué)英語
很多英語國家在漫長的歷史中，廣泛流傳著很多經(jīng)典的幽默小笑話。今天，小編為大家準(zhǔn)備了幾則經(jīng)典的英語笑話，給大家來分享一下，希望大家開心一笑，也能從中提高英語水平。一起來看看吧!
讀點(diǎn)笑話學(xué)英語：猶如幾個(gè)時(shí)辰
As a band instructor at an elementary school, I require my students to turn in practice sheets signed by their parents so I can be sure they are putting in enough time.
作為一個(gè)小學(xué)的樂隊(duì)指揮，為了確保學(xué)生投入足夠的時(shí)間練習(xí)，我要求他們上交由他們父母簽字的練習(xí)單。
I had to laugh, however, when one parent wrote on her child's sheet, "Practiced 17 minutes, but it seemed like hours.
可是有一次，一位家長的簽字把我逗樂了。練習(xí)單上寫著：“練習(xí)了17分鐘，但猶如幾個(gè)時(shí)辰?！?/p>
【注釋】
(1) band n.樂隊(duì)
(2) instructor n.指揮
(3) turn in上交;歸還
(4) signed by their parents:由他們的父母簽名的。這是一個(gè)分詞短語作定語修飾sheets.
(5) so I can be sure they are putting in enough time:這樣我才能確定他們投入了足夠的時(shí)間。這是so that 引導(dǎo)的目的狀語從句，其中that省略。
讀點(diǎn)笑話學(xué)英語：聰明狗
A dog owner claimed that his pet, when given money, would go to the news stall to buy a paper. his friend insisted on a demonstration and handed the dog some money - the dog trotted off, but an hour later he had still not returned with the paper.
一位養(yǎng)狗人宣稱：要是給了愛犬錢，它便會(huì)到賣報(bào)亭買份報(bào)紙來。他的朋友堅(jiān)持要來個(gè)演示，并給了狗一些錢。狗一溜小跑著去了。但一個(gè)小時(shí)過去了，仍不見它帶報(bào)紙回來。
"how much did you give him?" asked the owner.
一位養(yǎng)狗人宣稱：要是給了愛犬錢，它便會(huì)到賣報(bào)亭買份報(bào)紙來。他的朋友堅(jiān)持要來個(gè)演示，并給了狗一些錢。狗一溜小跑著去了。但一個(gè)小時(shí)過去了，仍不見它帶報(bào)紙回來。
"five dollars.
“五元?！?/p>
"well, that explains it. when you give him five dollars, he goes to a movie.
"這就是了。你給它五元錢時(shí)，它就去看電影。
【注釋】
(1) claim v.聲稱
(2) when given money是 when he was given money 的省略
(3) news stall n.售報(bào)亭
(4) insist on 堅(jiān)持
(5) demonstration n.演示
(6) trot off 小步跑開
讀點(diǎn)笑話學(xué)英語：讓我的司機(jī)來回答
A famous scientist was on his way to yet another lecture when his chauffeur offered an idea. "Hey, boss, I've heard your speech many times, I bet I could deliver it and give you the night off.
一個(gè)著名科學(xué)家起程去再作一個(gè)講座。他的司機(jī)出了個(gè)主意：“老板，您的講座我已聽了這么多次了。我打賭我能作這個(gè)講座，讓您休息一個(gè)晚上?！?/p>
"sounds great," the scientist said.“
那太好了。”科學(xué)家說
When they got to the auditorium, the scientist put on the chauffeur's hat and settled in the back row. The chauffeur walked to the lectern and delivered the speech. Afterward he asked if there were any questions.
到了禮堂，科學(xué)家戴上了司機(jī)的帽子，坐在了后排。而司機(jī)走上了講臺(tái)，作講演。講演結(jié)束后，他問聽眾是否有什么問題。
"Yes," said one processor.Then he launched into a highly technical question.
一個(gè)教授說有，并提出了一個(gè)高深的學(xué)術(shù)問題。
The chauffeur was panic-stricken for a moment but quickly recovered. " That's an easy one, " he replied, "so easy, I'm going to let my chauffeur answer it. "
司機(jī)一時(shí)被問懵了，但很快就鎮(zhèn)定下來?！斑@很容易，”他說，“太容易了，我要讓我的司機(jī)來回答。”
【注釋】
(1) on one's way (to)某人在……的路上
(2) chauffeur n.受雇駕駛私人汽車之司機(jī)
(3) give you the night off讓你休息一個(gè)晚上
讀點(diǎn)笑話學(xué)英語：富有挑戰(zhàn)性的搜尋
A woman answered her front door and found two boys holding a list. "Lady," one of them explained, "we are on a treasure hunt, and we need three grains of wheat, a pork-chop bone and a piece of used carbon paper to earn a dollar. "
一個(gè)婦人打開前門，看到兩個(gè)男孩手里拿著一張字條?！胺蛉?，”其中一個(gè)解釋道，“我們在尋寶。我們需要三顆麥粒、一塊豬排骨、一張用過的復(fù)寫紙來掙一美元?！?/p>
"Wow," the woman replied, "who sent you on such a challenging hunt?"
“哦，”那位婦女回答道：“誰讓你們作這樣富有挑戰(zhàn)性的搜尋的?”
"Our baby-sitter's boyfriend. "
“是我們保姆的男朋友?！?/p>
【注釋】
(1) pork-chop 豬肉排
(2) carbon paper復(fù)寫紙
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